Sunday, November 6, 2011

Mr. Right vs. A Few Mr. Right Nows...

I get it.

The one thing that everyone desires... is to be loved.  I'm there too.  So are millions of others.

What I don't get is why women focus so narrowly on finding Mr. Right, while men on the other hand, cast a large net.

Now, I am by no way saying that the man's way is the right way. But you have to admit that there is a lot to be said about the way men seem to narrow their playing field... and appear to have so much fun doing it. It also seems to me, generally speaking of course, men appear to be chosen as "Mr. Right," and buckle to the pressure before settling down to get married.  Generally speaking, of course.

Women on the other hand, appear to fall for what I call, "The Cinderella Fallocies."  This is where we think we find our "Prince Charming" and date him exclusively until we think he's ready to pop the question and live "happily ever after."  Meanwhile, the truth is that "Prince Charming" really is very charming, and is probably dating two, three, or more woman at a time.  Generally speaking, of course.

And so it seems reasonable for me to ask the question... "Why aren't more women approaching love and dating in the same fashion?"  "What's so wrong with casting that wide net, just to see how many you catch?" "Instead of Mr. Right... how about a few Mr. Right Nows?"

I know I am not alone.  More and more women are coming around to seeing the advantages of dating more that one man at a time.  I like to refer to them as-

 "DWELL-ers"... D ivas W ith E xciting L ove L ives!"

Last week, I watched "The Million Dollar Matchmaker" and Nate Berkus  guide a narrowly focused  40-something woman through her dating process, on the Oprah show.  I stress narrowly focused, because this woman had her heart set on one thing... marriage.  She was so disappointed in herself for being at 40-something and unmarried, that it blocked the potential for anything else to enter her space.  This decently attractive woman honestly believed that there was something wrong with her.

And while I gave props to Nate and the matchmaker for addressing the obvious desperation that emanated from her being, and the unrealistic expectations she set for her Prince Charming, I was a bit disappointed that no on suggested to her that she drop the narrow focus on "Mr. Right" and open herself up for a few "Mr. Right Nows!" No one planted the seed that dating should be fun... and she should enjoy it.  Stop taking it so seriously and approach it in a more light-hearted fashion. No told her to stop beating herself up... no one told her that single is not a curse!

It's freedom at it's best and I love being single!!!

1 comment:

  1. I wanna be a "DWELL"er...but do I have to dress up to do it? hahaha.