This month I celebrate the blessing of yet another
birthday.
My Facebook page both proudly
and humbly showcases over 100 birthday well wishes from friends and family. And while they are each individually humbling
enough to bring any girl to tears… there was one in particular that made me
take pause. It conveyed:
“So I see you still
have a love of the water… Blessings to you on a wonderful birthday.”
It was sent from a dear childhood friend with whom I
had known since the fourth grade. It gave
pause because her exclamation brought me back to a youthful time when my career
dream was to become a marine biologist.
It was this, that would later inspire me to become both lifeguard and a water safety instructor. The third of these career steps would require
future certification from diving instruction. In hindsight, I’m not exactly
sure how my youthful brain translated that into a career in water sciences, but
back then, I made perfect sense. I knew, in my heart of hearts, becoming a
marine biologist would fulfill a life long dream… and thus produce a lifetime
of happiness.
In the spirit of birthdays and happiness… There’s something
that magically happens once you are fully aware that you are about to enter
your forties. At least it did for me,
and for a few countless others whom I have promised shall remain nameless.
I remember it like it was yesterday, although in hindsight
it was almost 10 years ago. At age 36,
I made the life altering decision to not have children. Fresh out of a relationship lasting seven
years that I felt sure would end in marriage; the thought of being a single
parent was never even a remote possibility.
Unless my prince charming magically entered my life at thirty-six and we
could make a successful run at things before I turned forty, the possibility of
becoming a parent would be gone like the wind.
I searched for him, even prayed for him... but all to no avail.
As strange as it may seem, there was almost a metamorphosis
unconsciously manifesting during the three-year period following my
childbearing decision. And with that
came the realization that I was living life as it came to me instead of
creating the life I wanted. As a sports
fan, this translated into living a defensive life, when the reality should have
been that I should be creating an offensive life. Sure it is true that defense wins games… but
it is the best offense that sets the tone for the ENTIRE game. Set a great plan in motion, and then defend,
but only as the need requires.
So at age 39, it became necessary to inaugurate a new way to
think about my life’s path. Firm on my
parenting decision, and now knowing what was now set before me, another
inexplicable decision was made, which would unknowingly amend the course of my
life forever… I made the choice to be happy.
Sure this sounds easy enough, but in order to make it
happen, and then make it stick, the process one subjects them to is not an easy
one. It’s not just a decision, but
series of decisions, that then are required to translate into repeated actions,
which should then be performed over and over on a weekly, monthly yearly basis.
Simply stating that you want to be happy would then actually
require that you understand exactly what happiness is. Then the act of manifesting happiness in
your own life takes not just an understanding of how that translates for you,
but an entire journey involving exploration, that in my opinion… never really ends.
I believe that happiness is much more than the many words
that describe it. Contentment, pleasure, gladness, joy, bliss, delight,
exhilaration, ecstasy and glee just begin to touch the surface, once the
implementation of happiness begins.
Webster defines it as:
Now, this is just my modest
opinion, but to truly possess and retain these emotions is where the true occupation
lies. Keep in mind that there are ebbs and flows in every life. Considering this… How else can we expect to
know what true happiness is, if we haven’t been privy to life’s sadness and
hurt? How would we begin to understand satisfaction,
if we have never been through disappointment?
To expect to remain in a constant state of happiness is simply
naive. But at the risk of exploiting a
further point… I would suppose that this is where defense would play a
role. A great offense is nothing without
a great defense.
So with that being
said… first know and understand what
happiness means to you. This is a big
one so feel free to take your time with this one. It’s important. For with this initial step, as it then
becomes the foundation to forming a great offense.
Without full the comprehension
of what I have just described I began to comprise a catalog or a bucket list of
sorts, of the items, things, accomplishments I needed to achieve in my trek to undertake
the objective that is called happiness.
And while the record has been revised over the years, always remaining
at the top has always been to see the world.
So this birthday, it’s Central America.
And since diving was previously on the infantile catalog… then why not
knock off the adolescent aspiration as well?
As is my usual practice, I will be celebrating all month. Most of the month will be consumed with travel,
but I will make sure to close it out at the end of the month with family and
friends. It’s just a few of the many
things that I know make me happy. But
since we are talking about it…
Exactly what does happiness
mean to you…???
